Photo by Kane Hsieh
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"Ok so you got the rose...now what? I surprise her...go up to her and say something like 'this is for you'...no no 'for you' and give it to her. And then what...she is going to forgive you just like that? It is a rose for gods shakes! I should say 'I am sorry'...its honest, its sincere, she WILL have to hear me out then! Oh, I wish I was ten, riding my bike, again...then all I had to do is look somebody in the eye and they would forgive me just for being...ten!"
Without realising it...his is the next stop. He clumsily grabs the white rose, comes off the bus and replays the dialogue in his head. She is there, out in the garden, with her plants, wearing her big, silly hat...
"I'm sorry, mum! I know it's been a long time but...I' ve been busy and...this is for you..."
~ Marianna
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I shall tell you everything.
The colours of my life
And the contrasts of my being.
All of this I will give to you
In the silence of my meditation.
"Ok so you got the rose...now what? I surprise her...go up to her and say something like 'this is for you'...no no 'for you' and give it to her. And then what...she is going to forgive you just like that? It is a rose for gods shakes! I should say 'I am sorry'...its honest, its sincere, she WILL have to hear me out then! Oh, I wish I was ten, riding my bike, again...then all I had to do is look somebody in the eye and they would forgive me just for being...ten!"
Without realising it...his is the next stop. He clumsily grabs the white rose, comes off the bus and replays the dialogue in his head. She is there, out in the garden, with her plants, wearing her big, silly hat...
"I'm sorry, mum! I know it's been a long time but...I' ve been bussy and...this is for you..."
She said yes! I can't believe it! A date with her! My heart is pounding and my hands are sweaty.
I've been watching her around school for so long, her long hair swinging as she turns to talk to someone else. I've watched her cat-like body swerve as she leans in to purr a secret to her best friend.
Maybe the next secret will be about me.
this bus has been stuck her for so long, hey i wonder if i could ask one of those kids if i could borrow a bike, i'd get there quicker that way i think...
Such sweet gesture, to give to me this one rose. If only I am able to go to ride that bicycle with her. I do love that little girl, but she cannot come home with me. They will not accept her here. I wonder, was it a mistake to love her mother? No, it could not have been. If only my life could be different, my future with my daughter in it. If only I could be the father to her that I desire to be. If only....
There he is again! I pass him every day on the way to class, sitting on that same block under that tree, studying away. I wonder, if he looked up, if he could see me looking back at him...
~*It seems he looked straight at me and my heart sunk. He's standing up, tossing his bag over his shoulder. He's coming this way! I'll avert my eyes so he doesn't know I was watching him. Is he coming to the bus? He just got on. Oh my God, he's looking at me. Here he comes, just stay natural. A small smile to him is more than enough, and he sits next to me. Giving him this rose says everything that I cannot. The look in his eyes tell me that he feels the same way, and is not ashamed. Together we won't care what others think when they see us holding hands, or when we kiss goodnight, or...*~
The bus is moving again. He's still out there, engrossed in his text book. I shake my head, look down at the rose in my lap, and chuckle at myself. When will I get the courage to stop daydreaming and just do it?
I sigh. Maybe tomorrow...
The surprise of actually arriving made him immune- at least temporairily- to the dramatic changes. It wasn't until he glanced at a sign out the bus window that he realized- he couldn't communicate with these people. A translation book was in his pack but that was going to be difficult. All he had to direct him was an address, that maybe wasn't even right, and the silk rose she'd made.
Sure, he looked like them. But they all knew they were nothing alike.
Jee Yong took fifteen steps
Jee Yong saw the rose stuck in the hole on the little puppy’s collar
Jee Yong knew the puppy was uncomfortable
Jee Yong walked up to the puppy and removed the rose
The puppy scooted off only to picked up by a little boy, and dumped into the basket in the front of his bicycle
Jee Yong stepped into the bus, home was 18 minutes away
Jee Yong took his seat, and looked out the window
‘Vroommmmmm!’
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